“Deceptionist”

I don’t really care what you think about me or who I am, because you don’t really know me. And I’m not as naïve as you think I am. I might be blur and not street smart but I’m still capable of defending myself when time comes. Even if you are IT, I’ll still move on. Yah, you’re right, it’s none of your business, and it’s none of my business as well. So I guess we will just mind our own business and save myself first.

IT happened to me N years ago, but I manage to get away from this situation; the feeling of used and tossed package, the IT. But since then, I realized it will never leave me. No matter where I am. It will always be there. I guess this is what REALITY is. Yah, I’ll just have to bear with it and accept the fact that it happens to me again and grow up from here.

A friend of me actually told me that it happens to me when I’m in high school and from that time onwards, I’m aware of its existence. It is true, and I’m very thankful to the friend who told me about it. And thank to her, I’m more aware of IT these days and able to twist it a bit. Yup, it’s a bit. For now, a bit is enough for me. It might seem to be a bit for you but for a girl who is a noob at this, it is a big step up, and it’s a lot to me.

So, once again, it is back. But I’m going to stay strong and just bear with it. It’s going to end soon and soon it is. I hope. Even if it doesn’t, who cares? It’s their problem, not mine. I’m happy with my life even though this bothers me sometimes but I’m glad I had the friends who told me about it. As long as I move on, there is nothing to worry about. Yah, I’m going to move on. From here, I’ll move on, and found who are the one who will tell me and the one who are IT.

The more I care, the more I worry about you guys, the more IT happens. The more I try to fit in with you guys, the more the burden it is, the more IT happens. I still prefer being myself and just try my very best to be myself and work hard on my own. Even if it’s going to be alone, I know I’m not. I’ll always have those who will told me about IT and those who sincerely cares about me and I’m happy to just have them, even if it’s just less than ten.

For those who face the same thing, take this advice. Learn to say ‘NO’, be mean sometimes, don’t care too much about what the others think, just be yourself and one day, we will meet, be friend, together and laugh at those ITS.